


It's Not That I Don't Trust You

by creativeAmbiguity



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Bill kills a raccoon, Drabble, Humor, M/M, Pre-Relationship, Sentence Prompt, human!bill cipher, it's all good
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-19
Updated: 2016-04-19
Packaged: 2018-06-03 04:58:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6597667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/creativeAmbiguity/pseuds/creativeAmbiguity
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“You know Bill, if you want to live here you can’t go around killing the local wildlife.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's Not That I Don't Trust You

**Author's Note:**

> Sentence Prompt: It's not that I don't trust you, but...

Dipper surveyed the situation. Bill stood there, quite proudly in fact, brandishing a dead raccoon in his hands. While incredibly amused, Dipper was at the same time incredibly disgusted. Dipper walked around Bill in a very matter-of-fact manner, confusing the demon. Well, ex-demon.

“You know Bill, if you want to live here you can’t go around killing the local wildlife.”

“Well why not?” He replied defensively. “I used to practically own this forest, Pine Tree. I can do whatever I want with your precious local wildlife.” 

“You don’t own it anymore though. Last time I checked you were 5’2” and not some powerful being made of pure energy with zero weaknesses.” Dipper said snarkily.

“Hey! It’s ‘I’m a being of pure energy with no weaknesses,’ and I’d rather you not butcher my most cherished line, thank you very much!” Dipper huffed in exasperation. Pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Disregarding all of that,” he started, “why do you have a dead raccoon? More importantly, why are you giving it to me?” Bill looked back down at his hands. 

“I don’t know to be honest. I kind of killed it on accident and I thought you might have wanted it. Meatbags love raccoon fur, right?” Bill replied. An extremely wild (and borderline insane, in Dipper’s expert opinion) smile graced his face. “So, take it!” The shorter of the two shoved it into the other’s hands. 

“Yuck.” Dipper groaned. “I appreciate the gift Bill, and it’s not that I don’t trust you but…”

“But?”

“Raccoons carry a lot of diseases and this one looks like it has mange. Don’t tell me you gave me a dead raccoon with mange.”

“Oh look at that.” Bill mumbled to himself, tapping his finger on his chin. “It does.”

“BILL!”


End file.
